


Lies

by randomchaoticness



Category: The Avengers (2012)
Genre: kind of sort of maybe, lying, sort of headcanon?
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-03
Updated: 2013-02-03
Packaged: 2017-11-28 01:24:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 308
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/668668
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/randomchaoticness/pseuds/randomchaoticness
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Natasha lies to herself.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lies

It starts out as a simple lie. Her favorite color is red. She doesn't know why she is lying about that. It's such a little thing really, a favorite color. She hates red. The color of her hair, the color of blood. If anything it reminds her of what she has done. Who she was. Lie.  
Who she is, because no matter how hard she tries she will always be Natalia Romanova. Lie.  
Natalia Romanov. Lie.  
It is just a name, a name she used to go by. Her favorite name to go by. Lie.  
Or at least it used to be. She associates everything bad she has done to that name. Lie.  
She associates that name with a life she wants to forget. Lie.  
Or a life she hopes to forget. Lie.  
She has never loved anyone. Lie.  
She loved The Winter Soldier. Lie.  
She loved the man under The Winter Soldier. Lie.  
She doesn't think about him. Lie.  
She has never loved anyone else. Lie.  
She tries to stop lying to herself, but it's just little things, it doesn't really matter, right? She doesn't love Clint Barton. Lie.  
She left him because she knew she would hurt him. Lie, or sort of.  
She didn't want to hurt him, sure, but the reason she left is so he wouldn't have the chance first. Everyone she loves leaves. Lie.  
Everyone she loves is taken away, and she is tired of being hurt. Lie.  
She knows she deserves the hurt. How many people had she hurt in the same way? She is tired of the lies. Lie.  
All she has known is lies, they are all she has, so she continues to lie to herself. Her name is Natasha Romanoff. Her favorite color is red. She is no longer Natalia Romanov. She doesn't want to remember. She doesn't love.


End file.
